I was standing at cafe, waiting for my takeaway order when I saw an older man get up from his seat and walk over to a table where a mother and daughter were having a cafe date. After asking the mother if it was ok to give her daughter a small present, he turned to the 4year old and gestured that she close her eyes. With the OK from her mother, she closed her eyes in anticipation. When she opened her eyes, there was a coin on the table beside her hot chocolate. The joy that came across her face was priceless. She was genuinely appreciative of the generosity of this man and received it with confidence and pure gratitude. The gratitude was not only to to the man who gave it to her. It was also to the coin for existing in that moment and to herself for receiving it.
I thought about how those moments when we are young and malleable, have the potential to create our money stories. The mother allowing her daughter to experience receiving an unconditional gift. I thought about how nice it would feel receiving money like that.
As I continued to watch the interaction, the man turned around to sit back down at his chair. He noticed me smiling at his beautiful gesture and proceeds to pull a coin out from his pocket and throw it in my direction. I try to refuse his generosity but he insists. I take the coin with gratitude and enjoy the joy it brings him to give it to me. But, I hold the coin nervously. I felt so incredibly uncomfortable about having it in my hand. The thoughts that went through my head in that moment. “I don’t deserve this” “What will people think of me if I take this money”
I walked over to the tip Jar of the cafe I was waiting in and dropped it in. Immediately I felt much better. But it also got me thinking about how uncomfortable I felt about having money.
This experience has given me more insight in to the “money story” that I have been living. For many years, I believed that I struggled to make money. At some point in the last 5 years I began to realise that I can definitely make money when I need it. I am just also really good at spending it. I think it was guilt that I had started experiencing whenever I spent money. Even on food. I had created a story where not having any money meant I’d wasted it all.
12 or so months ago, I had an awareness that shifted my perspective a lot. Instead of feeling like I was “wasting money”, I began to see my spending as investments in my life. Not only did this allow me to forgive myself for not having money, but I also started to feel like I was making good investments with my money. The guilt over spending stopped and I actually in general feel better about my money situation.
Today’s experience took me deeper into understanding my story. As I analyse what I thought, experienced and felt in those moments, I realise its actually that I feel uncomfortable to have money in my possession. Making money is not a problem. Taking money is not the problem. But, having money in my hand is what I need to reflect on. This will help me identify why I’m not living the money story I desire to be living. Working with this is where the next part of my growth and transformation lies.
What is your money story and how do you want it to change?
Why did I share this story?
Because I want you to know our lives are full of moments that have the opportunity to trigger our change and transformation.
Transformation is also not sudden, it is a process that occurs over a period of time. There are stages of change and growth and there are periods of adaptation and assimilation of the new self into our lives. Just because you’re not where you want to be in this moment, doesn’t mean you aren’t exactly where you need to be on your journey to that desire. These moments of imperfection are but a part of the bigger picture you only see when you look back on your life. They will one day be a part of what makes you the best possible version of yourself. So for now, live your life as if every step you make is taking you in the right direction by using those moments of discomfort as catalysts of change and transformation.
Are you at the next part of transformation in your life? Book an appointment with me today and lets supercharge your growth.
